I’m using “speaker” in a loose sense here. I don’t just mean people who stand on a platform and talk to multiple people at once. I think most people know that telemarketers are advised to keep a mirror on their desks and smile as they talk to prospects on the phone, even though the prospect cannot see them. When people can see you, your appearance affects how your message is received. But it also affects how you feel about yourself as you deliver the message, which may have as great an effect on ultimate reception.
This concept is explored in some depth in Dressing Up the Brain: Wearing a Suit Makes People Think Differently found in The Atlantic. Check it out.
This weekend I will be presenting an education session for the District 63 Toastmasters Spring Conference in Chattanooga. We’ll be talking about Healthy Conflict, aimed at managing such within a Toastmasters club, but the principles apply to any organization.
Here’s the gist: conflict is inevitable. If you are alive, you will experience conflict. Many of us spend a lot of time trying to avoid conflict, and while we certainly don’t need to seek it or cause it on purpose, we should face the reality that it will happen, and so focus on developing skills for effective, healthy conflict. Continue reading “Conflict is inevitable; effective communication is not”
How do you deal with a potential social conflict? Most of us avoid conflict, and others seek it out. Neither is a particularly useful approach to communication.
There is a middle way. Continue reading “Don’t get caught in the polite-or-pushy choice”
Do you have to have difficult conversations sometimes? Perhaps with friends or family, perhaps with coworkers, perhaps with subordinates?
I will be speaking next week to a gathering of executives, managers, and business owners who are members of Executive Women International about difficult communication situations. Whatever else we’ll talk about, a key skill here is the ability and willingness to lean into discomfort rather than avoid it. Continue reading “Lean into the flinch”